oh where does the time go??

As I am putting a book together of Aidan's first 2 years, I am flooded with memories of when he was little. I say was, although he still is technically, because he seems like a big boy now. I mean, he's almost 2! Next thing you know, he will be going to pre-k, and soon enough, I will be in tears watching him get on the school bus for his first day of kindergarten. As much as I enjoy watching him grow, I miss him being little.

It seems like yesterday I was holding him for the first time. I can't even remember what my first reaction was to him, mainly because I was exhausted after being up 36 hours after labor, but I knew that he was special. I knew that I would love him more than he can ever imagine. I knew how important he was. I knew how much he would change my life. I look at pictures and remember those moments. I can't recall him being that small. I never thought of him as a 'newborn' since he was so big (well if you call 8lbs 14oz big). I never imagined him being that small when I held him in my arms. I didn't even realize it until now. Now that he can barely fit in my lap.

Although my little boy is growing up, I hope he takes it slow. I don't think I will ever be ready to stop the night-time snuggling on the couch, or the quiet rocking in the chair. How he snuggles up next to me and just falls asleep peacefully. Although he makes me mad, I will never stop enjoying how much he craves my love and attention. He is definitely a mommy's boy, and I don't mind that at all. I crave his little kisses, and sweet big hugs. I long for his laughter, and his corny smiles. I am sure I will miss his jabber, and telling me 'how it is' in his little baby language.

My baby boy is no longer a baby anymore. He is a toddler. And as scary as that may be, I will enjoy watching him grow up into a little boy. But just slow down baby. You are growing up way too fast.